"See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many." (Hebrews 12:15)
I love to love. But I wasn't always this way. I do have some trust issues and it has taken quite a while to get where I am today. Believe me when I tell you that I still have a long way to go. Once trust is broken, as with many, it is difficult to get back. However, with me it seems like an impossible mountain to climb. I'm currently climbing Mt Everest with one experience but that is not the story I will tell you today. Nor is this about trust. It's about loving others as Christ does.
There is one woman I love. She is the complete opposite of me. In many ways I wish I was more like her. I wish I had her confidence, her beauty, her generosity, her sense of style, her connections and her courage to do what it takes. She can walk into a room and command attention. When she speaks, people listen. This woman has no fear. Well, except one.
The fear she has goes completely against what I believe and hold to be Truth. Often times I have felt wrongly judged and misunderstood. This does not make her any less of a person or less lovable. The problem is with me.
I'm not going to try and sugar coat my failures as a Christ follower but to save some face I will spare you the details of my insecurities and how that can translate into judgement of others. But what I will tell you is that I have recognized that the problem is in me and that it is a problem. In trusting my beautiful Father, I have in turn given it to Him and asked Him to show me when there is a bitter root that needs...whacking.
So one particular morning, I was having a hard day trusting and letting go. I knew I had to go in prayer. I knew I had to hand it over to Him and that all I needed to do was courageously love. I asked God to clothe this woman in His grace so I could see her just as He loves her. I wanted to see her as He does every day, every morning, every minute of every hour. I needed to see her clothed in the same grace He covers me in. I finished up my prayer time and went about my day feeling thankful that God was helping me whack away at roots that needed to be removed. I certainly didn't want to leave in anything that the adversary of relationships could use against this woman I love.
It so happened to be that I was to meet up with her later in the day and I was looking forward to seeing her. I simply was not prepared for what I would see when I came around the corner.
I could have fallen to my knees in that moment.
This is what she was wearing...
... a shirt that said:
Thank You loving Father for showing me You are always listening. Thank You for loving her and letting me feel Your heart for her. Thank You for making sure I didn't miss Your grace.